


Calm down and grow the plants

by ChopinWorshipper



Series: The Olympians and their everyday shenanigans [7]
Category: Ancient Greek Religion & Lore, Ancient Roman Religion & Lore
Genre: Gen, Sorry Not Sorry, ares doesn't remember much vegetation magic, but he's also a god of vegetation and agriculture, implied Ares/Athena, it took ages for the two to get to this point, mars is a war god as we all know, one-sided mars/minerva, one-sided mars/nerio, so mars reteaches him, they initially really hated each other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-27
Updated: 2020-07-27
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:14:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 524
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25557910
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChopinWorshipper/pseuds/ChopinWorshipper
Summary: Mars reteaches his Greek colleague Ares how to garden.
Relationships: Ares/Athena (Ancient Greek Religion & Lore)
Series: The Olympians and their everyday shenanigans [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2148963
Kudos: 19





	Calm down and grow the plants

"Nonono, that's the wrong seed! You were supposed to plant oat, not wheat!"

"Shit!" With a frustrated scream, Ares threw the bag of seeds away and huffed in frustration. "I can't even remember which seed is from which plant! I will never get the heck of this again!"

"Again?", Mars asked, interested. "Are you saying that once you were capable of vegetation magic?"

"Still am. I can make ash trees and oaks shoot forth from the earth. But when it comes to makin' other plants grow, I fuck up. I just can't remember the magic for them! And as you can see I can't even tell apart...WHAT'S SO FUNNY???"

Mars snickered: "Calm down. Don't beat yourself up over this initial failure. Terra Mater almost lost it when she tried to teach me vegetation magic! The first days, she would yell at me each day to finally get my act together. Of course, that only made it worse."

Ares scratched his head: "Gaia never got pissed at me. But then again, I was just eight."

"So you too were taught by the Earth Mother?"

"Yeah. She took me in for a year, as a compensation for you-know-what. She taught me a lot and was more or less nice to me. I think she taught me how to grow all kinds of plants, but the only thing I remember is how to grow my sacred trees."

Ares stood up and grabbed his spear. "Shit, now I'm depressed. I need to go and start a war."

Mars swiftly grabbed his arm and said sharply: "You will do nothing of that sort, Ares. While I understand you, now is not the time for a war or a murder. I _will_ teach you how to grow stuff and you _will_ remember it!"

Ares threw a death glare at him and Mars chuckled: "You can glare at me as much as you want, I'm not gonna die."

"DAMMIT! YOU PISS ME OFF SO MUCH!!!", the Greek war god yelled at the Roman. "YOU BLASTED ROMAN FUCKTARD! WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE ANYWAY! WHATEVER GIVES YOU THE RIGHT TO ORDER ME AROUND, YOU ... you ... shit." 

Finally, he gave up and sat back down. 

"How can you be so calm, when I'm insulting you and yelling at you", he sighed tiredly. Mars smiled good-naturedly. "Because I have learned something crucial."

"And what would that be?", Ares growled, getting agitated again.

The Roman war god's smile widened: "I learned to calm down. Now come. We have a lot of seeds to plant."

"I swear, you remind me so much of Athena right now, it's creepy."

Mars laughed heartily: "Why, thank you! Nice to know that I remind you of the wisdom goddess you are totally in love with!"

Ares blushed bright scarlet. "Mars...I hate you so fucking much right now."

His Roman counterpart snickered: "I think I can live with that."

Ares glared. Then he suddenly smirked.

"So, how is Minerva? And does your wife Nerio know you have a massive crush on the blondie, huh Mars?", he asked innocently.

And now it was Mars' turn to blush and stutter.


End file.
